During the holiday season,there are single men and women around the world feeling lonely, disappointed,embarrassed and even bitter about enjoying festivities.That holiday invitation from your job and married-friends is still pending.Now some of you may be thinking that you have the right to feel the way you do but I am here to help shift your thinking.
It’s been almost a decade since I re-dedicated my life back to the Lord and it has been a beautiful experience.Ten years ago,I became sick and tired of being—sick and tired.Not only did I lose my mother and grandmother in the space of two years but I was terribly broken,confused and depressed from a relationship with my ex-boyfriend.
I was so hopeless that thoughts of suicide plagued my mind every week.You see,I grew tired from chasing perfection in school,pleasing people around me and still feeling unloved.These are a few signs of people who deal with a spirit of rejection which shall be another post.But growing up,I had no identity and when things did not go my way,I threw terrible tantrums.Such was the case when I first sat my board exam last year.This was painful because failures made me feel inadequate but I now know that there are no failures in God.And as my mentor would often say,”God reveals what He wants to heal.” The bible states in Proverbs 19:21, “You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail.”
I will share further details later on why that season served purpose in my life.If you’re like me,you receive countless questions about why you’re still single.For a few months,I struggled with this but I soon realized that God was and is protecting me.The fact that I am single is not because I hate men, but because I NOW recognize my worth as a woman.Christ opened my eyes and showed me my true value in Him.When we enter relationships knowing that the person we’re involved with emotionally and sexually is not good for us,we are creating soul-ties that become hard to break.
In addition to recognizing my worth,my desires in a man changed.As a teenager,I was concerned with marrying a tall,rich and handsome man but now I am more concerned with the spiritual needs.I am sure God will give me the aforementioned desires however,meeting a God-fearing man who knows who his purpose and identity is more important to me.I dated a spiritual man but we fell in love prematurely and he walked away from me.Fortunately,we’re much happier as friends.So not only should we look for God’s best in a mate,we must pray and seek God concerning the season.
So friends,don’t spend another minute crying over the last relationship or locking yourself up in your bedroom because no one has asked you out.Being single is also a time of celebration because there is so much you can accomplish with God on your side.It’s funny at times because I remember returning home for Christmas and as soon as I walked in the door and kissed my paternal grandmother,she asked me if I liked women.I knew her heart because she loves kids and felt that at 25,I should have been married but that didn’t happen.So don’t allow family and friends to upset you because you’ll be attending dinner alone.Be confident that God makes no mistake and kindly let them know that you are content for where you are in life.Declare today that everything is working out for your good.But if you are not confident in your response,then you need to ask yourself why.Your status is not complicated unless YOU are complicated.
Make the decision to believe the best about your life.Things didn’t work out the way you planned but God has something better in store for you but you must ENDURE this season.Make up in your mind that your marriage will be beautiful because you waited on God.Quit chasing someone who doesn’t make time for you and love yourself first.Maximize this season.Go back to school;start your own business if it’s God will for you;travel with friends or help improve the world through your gifts and talents.And who knows,while you are out celebrating being single and fabulous,you just may encounter the right person for YOU!